Random Ramblings
Uh oh 10/16/08
Zack is 7 1/2 months old but OOPS I forgot that I was supposed to stop cursing. Hopefully Scoobs is not listening to me yet.
Still generally incompetent as a parent. I am doing well as Scoo's nutritionist, but I'm not sure how much that counts for. I produce milk all day and night, and serve some on tap as well as bottle some for his use when we are apart. And I have made loads of fantastic organic babyfood from scratch and filled the fridge & freezer with it. (Literally, there is no room left for adult food).
But that is really just one piece of parenting, and many people would probably consider it a small or insignificant piece. Unfortunately that's all I've got to go on. And I am well aware that in a small matter of time, he won't need my milk or my purees. Then what.
For my part, when the milking is done, I look forward to more freedom. That certainly doesn't sound like something a Good Mom would think, now does it.
08/11/08
Motherhood. I had no idea I'd be so incompetent. It's also suprising how little motivation I feel to become competent. Luckily Danny is very capable and so Scoobs is not having to go without. Perhaps as he ages I will have more to offer. For godsakes, I hope so. Right now all I provide is milk. And diapers. And I do seem to have a nack for making him laugh, like no one else can.
Next task: I need to fucking stop cursing by the time Zack is 6 months old. That gives me.. a few weeks. Oh sheeeit.
Baby, Did you forget
I was alone, Falling free,
Trying my best not to forget
What happened to us,
What happened to me,
What happened as I let it slip.
I was confused by the powers that be,
Forgetting names and faces.
Passersby were looking at me
As if they could erase it
I was alone,
Staring over the ledge,
Trying my best not to forget
All manner of joy
All manner of glee
And our one heroic pledge
How it mattered to us,
How it mattered to me,
And the consequences
I was confused,
By the birds and the bees
Forgetting if I meant it
I was alone,
Falling free,
Trying my best not to forget
(Placebo)
Sing a Song
I sing to Scoobers all day long (Scoobers = Zack). But I found I was repeating "I'm a little teapot" over and over and over again, so I realized I had to branch out, and I came up with this...
Been spending most our time Living in a Scoober's Paradise
As I walk to the changing table in my small apartment I take a look at my stuff and realize there's no pee tent Cause Scoob's been blastin poop and pee so so long That even my hubby thinks that my mind is gone
Been spending most our time Living in a Scoobah's Paradise
Forgot the situation, he got me facin' I can't live a normal life, to his screams I'm racin' So I gotta be down with the Pampers team Too much midnight breastfeeding got me chasin dreams
I'm a educated fool, with money on my mind But now the paycheck has stopped, I'm in a bind I'm a big-ass momma, diaper-trippin banger And when my baby is snoozin, don't arouse my anger, fool
Loudass screams are just a heart beat away I'm livin life do-or-die ah, what can I say?
Tell me why are we -- so blind to see That this cute little Scoob's controlling you and me
Been spending most our time Living in a Scoobah's Paradise
Pumping every day, so breastmilk won't go sour Minute after minute, hour after hour I'm sittin here at home while nobody is looking The pump on my boob- smell what the Mom is cookin
Been spending most our time Living in a Scoobah' Paradise
Tell me why are we -- so blind to see That this cute little Scoob's controlling you and me
Spring
Woops, I almost forgot to ramble in Spring! It's almost memorial day!
I need to come up with some comments on new motherhood... but there is no time to type!
shannon@sleckey.com